Don't roll your mat too tightly

I've been working on my sitting and yoga this week. What I mean by "working on" is actually doing it. Simple goals with moderate expectation is to move a little more each day. 

I've been sitting every day for about seven minutes with a few sun salutations following. 

The mat is my common thread. The place of refuge where it becomes "my practice". The practice that takes me as and where I am. 

Mine is an old yoga mat. Flimsy and thin. It's an old yoga mat that has been rolled up for a long time.

The edges curl under and over when I take it out and those impossible edges keep rolling in during a session. Even when my eyes are closed in sitting, the edges are there and creeping in. 

And I know it. 

No matter how hard I try or how many times they are redirected, they continue to turn on me.

The rolling invasion on "my practice" is s symptom of the larger problem. The fact that the mat has not been used for a long, long time is the problem.

Even during recent use and reuse daily, those edges encroach. Why?

Then a realization: I roll the mat the same way each day. The old, flimsy mat receives a tight roll and is compressed to wait for the next session. That habit of rolling the mat too tightly each day supports the frustrating encroachment of the edges during my sessions.

I roll the mat the same way at the end of each session.
The edges curl during every session.
The curling causes a problem.

I cause the curling.

I cause the problem.

I am the common thread.

The "I" is the common problem. The "I" is the habit. The "I" is rolled too tightly. 

Don't roll the mat too tight
Loosen the grip. Let go.
The edges stay flat.

This is a note about letting go. The proposal of not grasping. Not reaching. Letting things just come. The practice on the mat in sitting or moving takes you just as you are.